I heard a fascinating interview today of an author of a book about bullying. I think the book's title is You Can't Say Can't and was written by a teacher who implemented a mandatory rule about kindness in her kindergarten classroom. I caught, perhaps, about the last half of the interview but it was nonetheless fascinating.
This past spring I had written about a first-hand experience watching two very young brothers bully my grandson on a playground. Because there was no physical danger to TLV, I did not intervene but did keep a grandmother's eagle eye on the situation, which, to me, was made all the more inexcusable because the brothers' mother was right there, observing the entire interplay. Never once did she verbally reprimand her sons, nor step in to intercede in any way. I've never forgotten the incident and hold the mother one hundred percent responsible for her sons' reprehensible playground behavior. And so this author's interview was all the more meaningful to me because I had witnessed very young bullies at work.
I am still left wondering if bullies are made or born or both. The book's author believes that she implemented a program with procedures that nipped bullying in the bud by enforcing a kindness rule. She offers proof of her rule's success by the story of a young female bully who, years later, would see the author and talk about how she was still kind.
TLV will begin a preschool program very soon and I hope that he will never need to have someone be forced to be kind to him nor will he have to be forced to be kind to another child. I pray that he does not need angel grandmothers to watch over him and protect him from bullies anywhere but the sad fact is that I am confident that he will feel the sting of a bully at sometime in his life.
Here is my challenge to the adults of this world. Let's shape ourselves up.
So much begins with us. Not only does life begin with us but the quality of life depends on us as well. I had a conversation with an elder adult today who no longer attends a monthly social gathering because she was recently verbally insulted to the point of emotional hurt at a past gathering. Is this not adult bullying? How can we expect the children of the world to be kind to one another when the adults cannot mirror the behavior we expect from our youngest members?
I repeat myself: Let's shape ourselves up.
Ancora imparo
