I really struggle with my mouth. Always have, perhaps I always will. Some of what I write today may sound familiar to this blog's readers, and I apologize, in advance, for any repetition.
Maybe it was growing up as a faux only-child that unleashed my speak-up gene. (My two older sisters were born quite a few years ahead of me. I was an "oops" child, born when my mother was nearly forty years old. ) Maybe it was because, as a child, both my parents worked and, after my care-giving maternal grandmother died, I did spend quite a bit of time alone, talking to who else - me! Who knows? I've devoted a fair amount of time to analyzing myself and have yet to come to a firm set of conclusions.
What I do know is this: Put me in a room full of people who are confused, but embarrassed to ask clarifying questions, and I'll be the one who will ask the first question. Over the years, it has not been usual for a friend, seated next to me, to elbow me and whisper in my ear, "I don't get this. Ask............"
Thus far, in my rapidly disappearing youth, I've managed to mostly avoid self-induced trouble,
and life-threatening situations created by my mouth. But.......here is my fear. As I move closer to my one-hundredth year than my year of birth, I sense that my aural governor is beginning to lose its effectiveness. This causes me great concern that one day, I may find myself in a poorly-run, interminable, unnecessarily long meeting and finally blurt out all that my mind has been thinking but my internal governor had previously prevented me from declaring to one and all present.
I have two upcoming-meetings, on my calendar, where I know that my urge to verbally purge will be great, but I will have-have-have to bite my tongue to the point of drawing blood. Because I am not fond of the taste of blood, I think that duct tape, strategically placed, might just be my saving grace, but I worry that it might look odd for a meeting-attendee to have duct tape placed over his or her mouth. I've thought of stuffing my mouth with soda crackers, just prior to the beginning of the meeting, but that would seem to be socially even more strange.
I'm leaning toward the duct tape option. Anyone got a spare roll or two or three?
Ancora imparo
