I am having a moral dilemma. Well, more like a feline dilemma.
My cross, cantankerous, feisty, ill-tempered, crabby kitty is very difficult to properly care for. I don't mean to anthropomorphize her, but as most pet-owners understand, a pet becomes a member of the family. It is as if I am caring for a geriatric old aunt who epitomizes the descriptors curmudgeon, battle-axe, old biddy, etc.
Frances was named - not by me - after my mother, who was a kind, generous and loving woman. My mother loved cats and she would have been pleased to know that Frances was given her name. But Frances' personality bears zero resemblance to to her human namesake's. Perhaps it is because Frances was from barn-cat stock, a kitten whose DNA was comprised of that of too many feral cats'. Whatever the cause, she has been a she-cat almost from day one. As she has aged, her nasty qualities have become even more pronounced.
It is as if her internal feng shui is out of balance. A Jekyll and Hyde, bi-polar, multi-personalitied feline in the body of a beautiful, long-haired animal with obvious Maine Coon heritage. One minute she'll be obnoxiously begging to be picked up and within seconds, may decide to hiss, go for a nip and jump down. You just never know which personality she will be displaying when you interact with her.
Ah, the long hair. She needs regular hair-care. Her long hair has a dense undercoat that easily and quickly gets out of control, forming mats like teenagers' faces sprout skin eruptions. Grooming her is always a gamble in which the groomer (me) takes his or her life in his/her own hands. Frances' neck has to be held, with one hand, in a forward position so she cannot turn her head with zeitgeist speed and bite you. Her instinct to bite usually kicks in within the first one-to-two minutes of grooming, when her tail begins to twitch violently and the growling begins.
Taking her to the vet.......fageddaboudit. I do take her for regular exams and her rabies shot, which, fortunately can be given in a two-year dosage form. Unfortunately, for me, this is a rabies- shot year.
I think someone should open a feline, geriatric nursing home. Someone with artificial, bionic limbs that are impervious to cat bites and scratches. Or, if any reader knows of a feline feng shui rehab clinic, please contact me immediately.
One of us is going into therapy. Her or me. It will be a race for the door.
Ancora imparo
