I am going to contact my Congressmen in an effort to propose legislation that would require new public dining guidelines. We've come a long way in making retail establishments and restaurants more pleasant with many cities and municipalities banning smoking in public places. Now we need to have separate dining facilities for those individuals who can (or do) still eat egg yolks, sausage, bacon, biscuits with gravy, steaks, steaks wrapped in bacon, meat smothered with blue cheese and the like.
It is simply not fair for people who have to eat egg whites, egg substitutes, tofu-sausage, soy bacon, and gruel-type concoctions passing as food to have to watch plate after plate of real (good) breakfast food (dinner entrees, too) being paraded past them. Having to see and smell what others CAN eat is not fair and it must violate some Constitutional amendment.....somewhere, somehow.
In fact, after I've contacted my Congressmen about this ground-breaking idea of mine, I'll work on organizing a new lobbying group, the AGLU: American Gruel-Lovers Union. We gruel-lovers must band together to help spread our message that we will no longer sit idly by in dining establishments and observe others eating what we no longer can. Let those who are able to eat fat and cholesterol dine by themselves - as a group - bound together by LDL and tri-glycerides.
How will AGLU members and chapters be identified? They'll be the ones frowning as they eat, wiping tears of sadness from their faces between bites - remembering the day when........ They'll also be the people with their faces pressed against the windows of the restaurants where the AFLU members eat.....with wistful expressions on each and every face.
What's AFLU, you ask? American Fat-Lovers Union.
I'm not allowed to join and there should be a rule about this!
Ancora imparo
