Self-belief is a curious commodity. Some people have it in spades, to the point of offensive self-adulation. Others have just the right amount to be self-assured without being obnoxious. There are those who possess very little self-confidence and there are yet others who have so little self-belief (or confidence) that a DNA test would probably reveal none present in their bodies. And then there is the curious category of the person who proclaims self-confidence and acts as if he/she has an over-abundance of the precious commodity, when in reality, there is nothing present but an outward bravado masking an inward level of severe self-doubt.
If we think long enough, we would all be able to identify at least one person we know that would fit into each category. Some categories might have multiple acquaintances in them. Likewise, every person who reads this would fit into one of the descriptions.
I have a friend who falls under the category of the latter: An appearance of strong-to-excessive self-confidence, when the opposite is actually the case. I used to see this type of persona frequently when I was teaching and even as far back as high school. My friend, I'll call her 'Brenda Bravado', comes across as highly self-assured. She has many reasons to be self-assured. She is uber-skilled at what she does, is physically beautiful and has a giving, caring spirit that comes across soon after you know her well. What troubles me deeply about her is her total lack of genuine self-belief. She simply does not see her self-worth nor does she see any reason for anyone else to find her worthy. I've known this woman for a while now and, despite frequent supportive conversations and exhortations to her to accept herself as worthy, I have had little or no influence on her to see herself as others see her.
I cannot give up, nor will I give up. There is too much at stake to write her off as a lost cause. I know that prayers for her are the answer but I would really like there to be a web site where I could go to purchase self-confidence and place it in an account with her name on it. We can purchase just about everything else known to mankind ('personkind' just doesn't make it) online, much of which is deleterious to our physical and mental health, so why can't we purchase those traits which would be beneficial to our bodies and minds?
I can hug her, cajole her, plead with her, send her cards, and pray for her, but in the end it is she that has to just believe........in herself. No web purchase, no magic potions, no prescriptions and no pills to swallow are available. Come on, Amazon, you sell everything else, why not self-belief?
Ancora imparo
