I am facing the fact that I am a 'dental wimp'. It is hard to believe that until I was around thirty years of age, any dental work I had done was performed without local anesthetic. Somewhere, in my early thirties, I grew uncomfortable with oral pain and started accepting 'shots'.
Yesterday was the first of two sessions for a crown and it was my first crown experience with this particular dentist. He was meticulous, careful (redundant, I know), and kept apologizing for his perfectionist tendencies, to which I replied, "I like the perfectionism trait in my dentist!" What I realized was that even after my mouth had been numbed with three shots, and I really couldn't feel him working, probing, drilling, and poking about in my mouth, I was still 'thinking' about the pain. Although I felt no discomfort (for the first two hours, at least), I knew great pain was lurking about and I kept waiting to feel it. Every time he'd withdraw his hand, and the wicked instrument it held, my body would instantly relax, even if only for a brief moment. As soon as his hand reappeared in my peripheral vision field, my sub-conscious would signal potential pain, and I'd find my body involuntarily taking a deep breath and then holding my breath. I had to keep reminding myself to breathe. I'd then give myself an internal chastisement over my fear of potential pain, only to feel the same reaction happen again - deep breath followed by the holding of my breath. For the last half hour of my two-and-a-half hour dental visit, my tooth began to wake up and the resulting sensations were not pleasant but I did not wish to encourage my own wimpiness.
I know that perceived discomfort is just as troublesome as actual discomfort but I found that it was nigh to impossible for me to overcome the fear of possible pain. Our psyches are such powerful forces, are they not? I am still marveling at the realization that all I had to do was 'see' the dentist's hand and I was certain that great pain was looming largely in my immediate future. I can see why dental torture is so effective. Ouch!
Enough already! My new dentist is great. Long live perfectionist dentists!
Ancora imparo
